a guy at school today was wearing this damn fine red nail polish and I heard these two girls whispering angrily and looking in his direction so I listened in expecting them to be weird about it and the first thing I hear is “how the HELL did he get it so good did he get it professionally done or something you need to ask him where he found that colour jesus fucking christ are you KIDDING me”
I think this is a good example of how the world should work.
before blaming others, think: whats the 1 constant in all your failed relationships? its that cursed egyptian amulet why do u even have that
(Source: neptunain, via foodless)
the 1700s called……they want their clothing back. haha just kidding the first telephone was invented in 1876
a good post AND i learned something. thanks tumbrl
DONT BE FRIENDS WITH ME I LAUGH AT MY OWN JOKES FOR YEARS
(Source: actuallybadcop, via fiftyshadesoffuckoff)
"we’re gonna have mcdonalds for dinner"